(Insert joke about Chris Cooley's junk here)

Thoughts from the weekend...

Saturday:

• Maybe Cal really was affected by the time change...
• Watching the Penn State/Syracuse game, ESPN made a very big deal of promoting the film The Express. While it made sense, given that the film premiered the night before in Syracuse, and given that Ernie Davis went to Syracuse. What didn't make sense to me was that ESPN, a subsidiary of the Walt Disney Company, was actively promoting a film by Universal Studios. While I commend it, it's unbelievably out of character for the House of Mouse. Ever watch ESPN? Every commercial is for something on ABC, and every 45 seconds they're pointing you to ESPNRadio, or ESPN.com, or the Disney theme parks, cruises, whatever. It got so bad that the ombudsman (yeah, I'm not sure what it means either) for ESPN wrote a lengthy column about it. It's refreshing to see something different. And speaking of Syracuse football...
• Ernie Davis wore the same number that Jim Brown did at Syracuse, which raises an interesting question; Syracuse didn't retire Jim Brown's number? Really? What, he wasn't good enough???? How good do you have to be to get your number retired??? (Addendum: That number, 44, was eventually retired in 2005 to honor Ernie Davis, Jim Brown, Floyd Little, and according to wikipedia, in honor of the school's ZIP code, 13244, which, oddly enough rushed for over 1,500 yards in 1975).
• Given what happened on Saturday, I'm willing to make one small concession. Pay attention, 'Rita: Penn State has an outside chance at running the table this year. Looking at their remaining schedule, their biggest challenges appear to be on 10/11 at Wisconsin and on 10/25 at Ohio State. Granted, they're going to have to put together something pretty amazing to win either one of those on the road, but like I said (to avoid the j-word), it's an outside chance.
• I've tried over and over to find a silver lining in UCLA's 'No-KY-No-Reach-Around' 59-0 behind the woodshed drubbing by BYU. Every time I do, I find that someone took a steaming dump in it. It was like watching the Creed/Drago fight. No one expected Creed to win, but come on!
  
• The 'Rita brought up an interesting point on Saturday: USC starting cornerback Shareece Wright was charged with a felony after being detained at a party last weekend. This story broke prior to the OSU game on Saturday night, yet Pete Carroll still gave him significant playing time. In my (and the 'Rita's) opinion, this shows a glaring character flaw on the part of Carroll. One of the 'Rita's biggest bones of contention this season has been the bad press Penn State has been getting because of the numerous suspensions (and one dismissal) of players by Joe Paterno this year. Think about it though...is it really that Penn State players are that thuggish, or is it that Paterno is so old (insert 'school' here, if you wish) and grizzled and hardassed that he's completely unwilling to let something as seemingly innocuous as a missed curfew under the rug? (Sidebar: I did a little research on this, and it turns out that Wright went to my alma mater, Colton High School and graduated a year ahead of my little brother. I called my brother to see if he knew Wright, but he just knew of him...never really talked to him or anything. And that little tidbit paled in comparison to what I thought when I found out that when he was detained, Wright was at a party in Colton. Now, I understand you may not know much about Colton, but it raises a question that baffles me: If you're a full-ride scholarship starting cornerback for the number one ranked team in the country, the University of Southern California...why in the name of all that is holy would you go to a party in Colton??????)
• Ohio State: O-H! S-H! I-T!
• I'm convinced that USC could handily beat the Kansas City Chiefs, the Miami Dolphins, the Detroit Lions and my beloved San Francisco 49ers.
• After that win, I'm so happy not to live in Los Angeles anymore. Having grown up there, I can say from experience that LA's front-runner fan reputation, for the most part, is well deserved. I can only imagine the number of USC flags on cars all over the southland these days. By the way, you wanna know why LA doesn't have an NFL team? Three words: Ewe. Ess. Sea.
• Tina Fey is the funniest woman on the planet.
• Michael Phelps has nuked the fridge.
  

Sunday:

• Jim Zorn set the tone for a great Redskins season by going for it on 4th & 2 at the end of the game. I'm not saying they're going to contend yet, but he exceeded all expectations by calling a pass instead of a handoff to Portis. Well done.
• Chris Horton may have just earned himself a starting job; two interceptions and a fumble recovery in his first NFL start due to an illness to Reed Doughty. I'm guessing Doughty feels breath on the back of his neck.
• Mike Shanahan has bigger stones than you. Mike Shanahan has bigger stones than Liz Taylor's jewelry box.
  
• Ed Hochuli was the number one pickup on fantasy waiver wires on Monday.
  
• The Seattle Seahawks are 0-2. The Jacksonville Jaguars are 0-2. The San Diego Chargers are 0-2. The New England Patriots are 2-0. Of those teams, precisely one has a quarterback that's won a Super Bowl, and his backup has more wins than any of the other three teams mentioned above this season.
  
• JT O'Sullivan is the next Jeff Garcia. Yeah, he had his moments, but he's not the answer either. To Dr. John York, from me, an embattled, passionate 49er fan...please please please PLEASE! SELL THE FRANCHISE TO SOMEONE WHO WANTS TO WIN!!!!
  
• I ate eight pounds of meat last night...and an equivalent amount of fried polenta. Then I slept the sleep of pure, unadulterated, gluttonous, hedonistic bliss.